Night Safari: When Nature Calls

Thursday night we decided to check out the Night Safari we've been hearing so much about. They have a lot of posters up for it around town, and basically it's the zoo, but at night! It turns out it's a really big tourist attraction, because we saw more white people standing in line than we have anywhere else in Singapore. It was like being in a Gap.

We got on a tram, which takes you around the different animal enclosures. It was like Jurassic Park, but without the screaming. While some of the animals were boring and sleeping (looking at you, lions), a lot of them were nocturnal so they were up and about. We saw creatures I've never even heard of, like a binturong, also called a bearcat because it's a kind of cat that looks more like a bear, and smells like popcorn. Seriously, I'm not making that up. You'd think it'd be a hindrance to smell delicious in the wild, but maybe that's why they're endangered.

There was this adorable animal called the slow loris, which is a small monkey with huge eyes that moves like a sloth. It had it's butt to us, and it looked like a miniature bear trying to slowly climb a tree. Every slow loris should be accompanied by circus music, they always seem a little confused but good sports. I want one as a pet, I would name it Slow Laura and let it wander aimlessly around the apartment.

We saw Asian elephants, which are a little smaller than African elephants but obviously still enormous. They had two females and one pissy male, who had to be kept separately because he's moody. Apparently he throws things at visitors, and charges people who use flash photography. Now, I'm not a scientist, but maybe this guy shouldn't be in a zoo.

We saw some very friendly servals, cats who came right up to the glass and tried to play. There were free roaming tapirs, who walked behind the tram for a little while and look much bigger up close. A babirusa, an uncomfortable looking pig with four giant tusks growing out of it's mouth. We went to a bat enclosure and saw giant fruit bats and small brown bats. The fruit bats were cool, just chilling and eating bananas, but the brown bats were flying around being obnoxious and pooping on everyone. There was a German family behind us, and when the crap starting raining, the little boy marched over to the door and announced something in German that I'm pretty sure translates to "screw this, I'm not getting shat on, I'll be outside."

The last stop on the tour was the deer section, which was kind of anti-climatic. I guess they don't have too many deer in Asia, but coming from Texas, it's like having a hamster exhibit. There were a few different kinds who all looked alike to me, except some had spots and some had smaller spots. Then we came upon the mousedeer, which totally redeemed the whole section. A mousedeer is a hilariously small deer that's no bigger than your forearm. It has these little spindly legs and a fat furry body, like someone stuck long toothpicks into a potato. Instead of those useless miniature chihuahuas, girls should get these to carry around in their purses. They're less trembly and way cuter. I kept laughing whenever I saw one, they just look like cartoon creatures instead of real animals.

(Side note: I didn't get a chance to take a lot of pictures, since it was dark and I didn't want an elephant having a mid-life crisis charging at me. I did manage to get a few good ones of the servals, since they seemed as interested in us as we were in them. So you'll just have to use your imagination or Google to see what the other animals look like.)

It ended up being a lot of fun, even if it was a bit touristy and overpriced. Totally worth it to see the mousedeer and the slow loris in all their natural hilarity, plus it was interesting to see some of the animals that are native to this area. If I ever run across a slow loris in the wild, it's coming home with me.